One Year

Sitting with my little cutie and his nebulizer one night, with him all relaxed in my arms, I suddenly felt so thankful for him!  I can't believe that one year ago I was big and pregnant in my flooded house.  :)  I also got thinking what a miracle he is, and feeling sentimental about this journey that I won't take again.  Each time I have a baby I'm so amazed at the miracle of life and that I get to take part in it all.  Of course Heavenly Father and my dear husband are the other important part of the equation, I don't mean to leave them out, this is just a mom's perspective. I wrote this poem, its not great, but here goes anyway:

One Year
On the eve of your first birthday,
Your head nestled in the crook of my arm,
Drifting off to dreamland,
I remember when you were
Only a dream and a wish,
An ethereal mist of my mind’s hope.
Then one day you were
Something,
The beginnings of you
Small, round,
Simple,
Growing
Inside me.
Now
Two lines on a pink stick
Exhale.
A thought—
A boy.
Now a little heart forming,
Forming,
All tiny liver,
Lungs,
Taking shape,
As my shape
Changes, too.
My heart raced inside me
The first time I heard
Your tiny one galloping
Across the moon;
Now my heart fluttering,
Fluttering like my
Insides,
Now a wave of nausea
Passes at the wonder of
A lump kick
From pole to pole.
Now big, heavy,
Wracked,
Blackness,
Then
You.
So beautiful,
Crying,
We’re crying,
We’re crying,
You’re so
Beautiful.
Your fingers hold mine
Till they’re white
We see each other
Our skin and warmth
Breathe together—a
Sigh of relief and joy.

Now here you are,

Almost One.
You look at me with your grave dark eyes,

Say 'no, no, no,'
Laugh when I do,
Arms up for “mama,”
Crawl like a banshee,
Love like I never knew.

I remember the
Two-lined plastic stick and how you started from
Nothing;
You fill my arms,
Round red-cheeked,
Mouse-brown hair
Wet against your
Head;
A tiny bruise
Graces your chin from
Brave adventures,
Your busy-boy body
Melted into mine
For the next moment or so.
I watch your pulse
Flutter faintly
In your neck
And thank heaven
For my little boy.